


Waxing Poetic

by quincette



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Accidental Bondage, Canon Universe, Crack Treated Seriously, Explicit Language, M/M, Sexual Tension, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-04
Updated: 2016-01-04
Packaged: 2018-05-09 18:37:55
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,209
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5551079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/quincette/pseuds/quincette
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's not often that Captain Erwin Smith is caught playing truant. </p><p>But it's waxing day in the Scouting Legion, in which every man (and in special cases, woman) with the amount of body hair deemed excessive enough to interfere with the 3DMG's performance must undergo a full body hair removal procedure. As his magnificent eyebrows indicate, Erwin is one such a man.</p><p>And if there's a kind of pain that could sneak past the Captain's impenetrable defense, it's this one. </p><p>His newly-minted Corporal, Levi, of course, would have none of that nonsense.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Waxing Poetic

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kleficklepick](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kleficklepick/gifts).



“I trust you’re settling in nicely to your new role?”

Levi's throat made a sound that he hoped sounded enough like an answer.  _What the fuck does that even mean?_

Across the desk, Shadis hummed a response, but held their eye contact like he was expecting an actual, verbal response.

Hell, he was.

“Yes,” Levi said, suppressing a hiss that threatened to trail the end of the word. He hated this. They had done poring over the reports and numbers. Their business had been concluded. There was no need for small talks – that was Erwin’s job. One he would have done so well, as usual, had he not decided to abandon Levi for some last minute errand.

Seconds stretched in silence. Levi fidgeted. By the look of it, the Commander seemed like he was as equally uninterested in dragging this briefing past its objectives, so why not dismiss him already?    

“I’d appreciate if you can elaborate, Corporal.”

Levi still didn’t know how to respond to that. “What do you want to know?”

Shadis’s response, mercifully, was interrupted by knocking on the door. “Come in,” Shadis said, his eyes still on Levi.

“Commander, Sir,” it was Moblit. “I am –” he stopped abruptly after briefly scanning the office.

“Yes?” Shadis said.

“I was looking for Captain Smith, Sir,” he sounded apologetic. “He told me he’d be at this meeting…”

“And I bet he’s not.” Mike’s voice said behind him.

“Mike.” Shadis said as the Squad Leader step into the room.

“Hange told me,” Mike said to Moblit. “I thought you might need some help with Erwin,” he looked to Shadis. “It’s one of those rare days, Keith.”

Shadis made a sound halfway between a huff and a sigh. Levi couldn’t tell if that’s exasperation of annoyance. But apparently everyone in the room shared an understanding of this cryptic exchange.

Everyone but Levi.

“Well, looks like you got your work cut out for you, Corporal,” the Commander said to Levi. “Mike, walk Levi through it, this might be his first real test on being Erwin’s second-in-command,” he said to Mike. “Make sure Erwin’s in his best shape before the next expedition. Dismissed, all of you.”

Levi frowned, but followed Moblit and Mike out of the office anyway, glad of the respite and curious about the whole exchange.

“You’re going to tell me what all that was about?” Levi doubled his steps to keep up with Mike’s longer strides.

“Where did Erwin say he’d be?” Mike asked, slowing down just a little bit.

“In town, on some errand.”

“Where?”

“The docks, the Mercier’s,” Levi tried to remember what Erwin had said before his rather abrupt departure earlier. “Some other places, I didn’t catch them.”

“I see.”

“What is this all about?”

Mike stopped in his tracks. “We need to get Erwin back to the base today, otherwise he’ll miss his schedule. I hope he finds what he’s looking for, in that case everything’s good. But if not,” he looked to Moblit, who was still frowning. “We need to split up. Then whoever finds him signal the rest to come help, if needed.”

Moblit nodded vigorously.

“What the fuck is that blond up to?”

Both Mike and Moblit turned to look at him at the exact same moment, it made Levi anxious. Then Mike scanned him head to toe.

“You wouldn’t understand,” he sounded strangely wistful, which only served to make Levi more irritated.

“Try me,” he spat.

“You are practically hairless,” Mike says flatly.

That obviously didn’t help.

“You are lucky, Corporal,” Moblit offered. “You don’t need to go through the mandatory hair removal procedures.”

Levi crossed his arms, scowling. “Well, sucks to be you then. But that’s been part of the routine since fuck if I know. How is now any different?” 

“There have been a sugar shortage for while now.”

“Huh?”

But Mike had resumed his pace. “I’ll fetch some flares. You go ready the horses,” he said.

“What the flying fuck, Mike?”

“We, are hunting Erwin down, Levi,” he said. “How’s that for a change?”

 

***

 

Erwin wasn’t at any of the places he had said he would be. Old Mercier said to Levi that he did make a stop there in the morning but left soon when he found out the haberdashery had no new shipments of sugar or honey for sale. The next harvest would not be ready until months, neither would the honey from the apiary, as it was barely past winter.

“Sina keeps all the honey and sugarbeets from our last harvest close to her bosom,” said the shop owner. “For the King’s seventy-fifth birthday, they said.” The old man also told Levi that Erwin or someone on his behalf had been checking the stock almost every day for the past six weeks.

When they regrouped at the center of the town, Mike and Moblit had similar reports. Erwin was neither at the dock nor at the market. No shipments of sugar or a drop of honey to be found anywhere. The town was out of the two sweetening substances. And no words about supplies from the capital either.

“What’s the big deal?” Levi said. “The town is out. He’s probably headed back to the headquarters by now.”

“Not without sugar he won’t,” Mike said.

“It’s not like he can’t do it without it.”

“Corporal,” Moblit said, “Are you familiar with the waxing procedure?”

“You slather wax to your hairy skin and rip your hair out with strips of paper and there you have your skin smooth as a baby’s bum. Which the brass said makes you less incompetent with 3DMG.”

Moblit grimaced, “It could be painful. More painful for some people. That why we need ample time between the procedure and the actual expedition. The skin needs to recover.”

“And Erwin is one of these people?”

Moblit nodded. “Waxing with melted sugar or honey is significantly less painful.”

Levi turned to Mike, who looked like he was deep in thought. “You’re telling me that Captain Eyebrows can’t handle a little grooming?” he said, incredulous.

Mike shrugged.

“So what happened last time?”

“He dodged his turn with excuses - meetings, errands, whatnots. Everyone thought none of that. He skipped it. Then came the expedition, he was seriously injured.”

“Because of body hair?” That’s probably the most ridiculous thing Levi had ever heard since joining the Corps a little over a year ago.

“It did interfere. His 3MDG malfunctioned,” Moblit said.

“We cannot afford that now that he’s the Captain. If something like that happens again it could mean not just his death but ours too,” Mike said.

“Are you fucking kidding me? That is the stupidest shit I’ve ever heard. He’s so hung up on Shadis’s shitty formation but he’d risk this to save himself from a little pain?!”

“That’s why I said you wouldn’t understand, Shortfuse,” Mike said. “You and your hairless hide.”

“Let’s just focus on bringing him back to the base today,” said Moblit before Levi can spit venom. “He must still be in town, just waiting out till it’s too late to do it he’ll have an excuse to skip the procedure.”

“Unless he’d ride to Sina.”

Moblit looked concerned, Levi was unconvinced, “He’d ride two days straight for a sack of sugar?”

“He’d done that for less. Have you seen Erwin when he’s really onto something?”

They all fell silent.

“The road to Sina then,” Mike said, kicking his mare into a gallop.

 

***

 

They didn’t find Erwin. And witnesses along the road said they didn’t see anyone who looked like him passing by.

“He couldn’t have gotten away that fast,” Levi said, scanning the horizon where the road to Sina disappear.

“He’s not going to Sina,” Mike said, sniffing the air. “He’s nearby.”

They headed to the forest and split up, agreeing to fire a flare should they found their Captain. All the while Levi’s internal monologue was repeating how stupid the whole thing was. Granted he had never thought of Erwin as anything but unpredictable, but playing truant for something so trivial? How bad could it be to have some hair yanked out of your skin after all that has happened to them in the corps? It felt like a bad joke.

It almost made him think that there’s something else to this.

Some fifteen minutes later a flare shot up somewhere to his left. Black smoke. Levi snorted. An aberrant, how fitting. He fired off his grapplers and shot up to the trees. The uneasy feeling forgotten, replaced by the excitement of a chase.

Hunting Erwin for change. Maybe he would get to kick his ass a bit before hauling him off to the base. That’d be something.

He heard the scuffle before he saw it. Just when he could make the blond of Mike’s head behind the screen of branches and pine needles, Erwin crashed into his vision. He only caught a glimpse of his blue eyes before he felt his right shoulder being knocked out of the way. The collision forced him find secure footings to adjust. By the time he did he saw Erwin’s dark green cape disappearing behind the foliage.

Oh, he’s so going to land a punch or two before hauling his supposedly hairy ass back to the base. Preferably on his clean-shaven face.

Levi wasted no time, swinging around to chase after the errant Captain.

“He’s heading to the valley!” he heard Mike shout behind him.

When he saw Erwin again, the man had reached the clearing and abandoned the trees; he was running on foot towards a field of blooming snowdrops, the cape with the black and white emblem billowing after him. He took a second to notice how small he had looked on the field of green and white from his current vantage point, if only he could crush him like a bug between his fingers.

With no more trees to swing from Levi was forced to make a drop to the ground and chase him on foot. He whistled for his mare while chasing Erwin down. Melted snow, fallen branches and snowdrop buds crunched on the ground beneath his feet. With every steaming breath he cursed Erwin’s long legs. 

But the figure in his vision was no longer running. Erwin was standing still in front of a cliff. Levi readied his grapplers, anticipating Erwin’s move had he decided to climb the rock face.

But he stood still, looking up, his hood fell to reveal his blond head. Levi kept running, but unsure what to do when he was certain he would catch up with him.

They were close enough, Erwin must have heard him approaching but he didn’t make a move, appeared to be scanning the rock wall with this eyes.

“Erwin,” Levi said, hands on the handle of his blade. He did not expect this, a fight he would oblige gladly but as of now he wasn’t sure what he’d suppose to do.

“Levi,” said Erwin, like he did when he saw Levi barge uninvited to his office so many times, like nothing was out of the ordinary.

“You need to get back to the base,” he said, with an added venom.

“Yes,” Erwin sounded resigned.

Levi did not expect this.

“What the fuck is going on Erwin?” Levi rounded him. “Mike told me about some stupid mandatory hair removal and you playing truant so you wouldn’t have to do that-“

“They’re not ready.”

“Huh? Who the hell are they-“

“The bees.”

“What?” Levi thought that maybe he had never woken up that morning and instead had been in a dream where everyone but him speaks in riddles.

Very slowly Erwin removed his gaze from the rock wall to meet Levi’s eyes. “It’s too early in the spring,” he said, blue eyes looked bewildered, bushy eyebrows dusted with frost, his usual immaculately parted blond hair windblown, and his cheeks and the tip of his beak nose tinged red from the cold. “I should have stocked some in the summer.” He gestured with his hands.

Levi looked up and saw there, on an overhang, a small lump, a beehive.

“I'd never pegged you to be someone so dainty he couldn’t survive without sugarbeets and fucking honey.”

Erwin laughed to that.

Levi heard the sounds of hooves and turned around to find his mare led by Mike on his horse, and Moblit riding not far behind, leading Erwin’s dappled gelding.

“You just have to power through it, Erwin,” Mike said.

Erwin nodded. “Looks like it,” he put a hand on his neck and exhaled, breath misting. "I apologize for dragging all of you through this.”

Mike snorted. “I doubt that. And I doubt Lindt would wait. Get on your horse and ride like hell to the base now, it’s almost sundown.” 

 

***

 

Turned out that Doctor Lindt would not wait. Even when they caught her just as she was finishing her last session.

“Helene,” Erwin began.

The doctor shushed him. “I should be in Lord Schrader’s manor ten minutes ago, Erwin. And I’m not sure you weren’t late on purpose,” she gave him a pointed look.

“Helene, we know we didn’t pay you enough–” Mike tried.

The doctor scoffed, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. “It’s never been the problem Mikael,” she shook her head. “Survey Corps will always be dear to me. But Erwin –”

To Levi the doctor had always looked like she had something sour in her mouth – there’s a pinched look about her not unlike that on disapproving middle age mothers. Which she probably was. And right now she looked especially disapproving.

“–I never want to spend another week treating my patient blindly because you break another pair of my eye glasses. And to this day Klaus still refuses to escort me to this base and he is my best assistant.”

“I understand and I apologize, Helene,” Erwin said, his voice taking that tone that Levi recognized he only use to sweet-talk Sina’s finest during their frequent fund-raising campaigns. “If it’s any-”

The doctor shushed him again, this time with a gloved hand. Her eyes were on Levi.

“You,” she said to Levi, “You have assisted me in the medical wing before, haven’t you?”

Levi had, the last few expeditions’ aftermath. Medic staffs were expensive and hard to come by and he always find himself in need of something to distract him post-expeditions.

“Yes.”

“Good. I like your work, you are meticulous,” he turned to Erwin, “He can do it. I have twenty minutes until Maude finish tending to your last soldier and my carriage is ready. You better clean up and strap yourself tight. I will show-” she turned to Levi and lifted her salt-and-pepper eyebrows.

“Levi,” Erwin supplied.

“I will show Levi how it’s done.”

Erwin nodded and excused himself, Mike trailed after him, leaving Levi with the Doctor, who was packing up.

“So,” he said, curious. “What happened to Klaus?”

 

***

 

For a second Levi had thought that they were entering the torture chamber instead of a room in the medical wing. What with Erwin naked –well, almost– and strapped tight to a narrow bed with probably more leather straps and buckles than necessary.

It was a sight to behold. And one that was provoking something inside Levi, something that he was absolutely not ready to acknowledge right now.

Levi had seen Erwin in such state of undress before, more or less, but he had never realized that Erwin was such a hirsute. Maybe because of his hair was blond, all over.

“Ah,” Lindt said approvingly, walking into the room. “Clever. This should make it easier.” She approached the bed, testing the leather straps, and finding them satisfactory, moved to inspect Erwin’s skin.

“He’s clean and ready,” she announced. “Come closer, Levi.”

He did as he was told, while awkwardly cradling all the supplies Lindt had handed him earlier.

“Now, are you fine with screaming or do we need to gag you?”

She said that to Erwin with a straight face that would rival that of a seasoned madam of the underground’s most debauched brothel, one that was favoured by anyone, both under and aboveground, who can afford its service. It didn’t help that she has changed her plain doctor’s garb into a riding dress, neck high and tightly laced, hands gloved in black leather. That, inadvertently, painted a whole another picture in Levi’s head.

He chewed on the inside of his lower lip, feeling the blood rushing to his face. By the look of it, it did something to Erwin too.

“I’m–” he cleared his throat, “–fine.”

“Are you familiar with how this is done?” Lindt asked Levi.

“I-, yeah,” for a second Levi wasn’t really sure what “this” she was referring to. “- more or less.” He proceeded to arrange the supplies on a side table to distract himself. The clatter of jars and bottles of ointment sounded too loud to his ears.

“I’ll show you just once. Watch closely,” she said, reaching for the wax container, strips of fabric, and a thin strip of wood. She sat next to Erwin’s shin and started coating his skin with warm wax. Erwin’s skin visibly jumped.

“No sugar this time?”

Erwin sighed. “So many things happened. I didn’t realize I was out.”

“Unfortunate. But you might as well get used to peat wax,” she said, almost tenderly.

“I just hope I won’t hurt anyone.”

“Well, it’s fortunate that we have your Humanity’s Strongest here now,” she said. Levi glared dagger at both doctor and patient. He never liked that, never ask for that, it was all part of Erwin’s propaganda. Erwin who now had the gall to look sheepish.

Lindt hummed. “Levi,” she said. “This is how you apply the wax, on the direction of the hair growth, start from the root and make sure to coat evenly. Then press the fabric strip, leave a little tab for pulling.”

Levi watched closely, concentrating of every minuscule detail so he wouldn’t have to pay attention on how strange the situation they were in right now.

“Then you wait for ten to fifteen seconds. I usually use the time to apply wax to other areas, but Erwin here is a special case. It’s better to do it strip by strip for him.”

Levi’s eyes met Erwin’s, there is a pleading look on them.  

“Have you had any training or medical experience?” she asked.

“No. Not formally,” he said, not exactly lying. He didn’t think that the occasional patching up he had done to himself and his friends in the underground counted as that.

“Huh,” she looked unconvinced. “Nonetheless. If you find yourself unable to go out on the field anymore,” she paused. “And alive with at least one functional hand though, of course, I could use some help downtown at my clinic.”

Levi was not sure what to say to that.

“He’ll be around for a long time, Helene. He’ll outlive me,” Erwin said.

“That would be because you have a death wish,” she said, echoing Levi’s sentiment. She patted the fabric strip on his shin. “It’s ready. You should draw the first blood. Here.”

She showed Levi the tab on strip. The wax had settled and he was to pull it. He heard Lindt unscrew another container. A smell peppermint wafted in the air. “Apply this ointment after, to soothe the burn.”

Levi nodded.

“Whenever you are ready. Quick and clean, Levi.”

Levi’s eyes flicked to Erwin for a second. He looked alright, no apparent anxiety, how bad could it be? He yanked the strip.

It sounded like a fabric being ripped apart.  

Erwin didn’t make a sound, but the bed did, creaking in protest as its occupant arch his body.

Levi looked at the strip of fabric with blond hair on it. Erwin’s shin was smooth now, if a bit red. Lindt handed him the ointment and moved to speak to Erwin.

“Wasn’t so bad was it?”

“It’s only going to get worse,” Erwin sounded hoarse.

“Yes, and you just have bear it,” she said. “I’ll take my leave now before Lord Schrader actually send his goons to fetch me. Hope I don’t see you lying in bed next time we meet.” She touched Erwin’s cheek briefly.

The only sound Erwin made was a sigh, as Levi applied the ointment to his freshly waxed skin.

“Levi,” Lindt inclined her head to the door. Levi followed her. “Do the legs first, take care to clean all the hair in upper and inner thighs. Then do his back, and his chest, or whichever he prefers first. Chest area is going to be the most painful, be glad you don’t have large nose like Klaus, though I expect he won’t flail as much now that you have him strapped like that.”

“What about the rest of his body?”

“You can leave off the arms and the groin area, they won’t interfere with the gear. Though some don’t mind having them removed –might as well, you know? – but considering how painful this is for Erwin, I don’t suppose he would want that. Apply the ointment generously, it does help,” she explained, putting on her hat and fastening it with pins. “Goodbye now, Humanity's Strongest.”

She patted his cheek, and disappeared to the corridor before Levi could flinch from the touch.  

 

***

 

Levi closed the door, the sound masking his sigh.

“I thought after over a year I had witnessed every stupid shit that could have happened here,” he approached Erwin and sat on Lindt’s vacated seat.

The Captain let out a strangled chuckle, “Survey Corps is a gift that keep on giving.”

“Mike strapped you there right? He should be doing this instead of me.” Levi said, hoping for an escape.

“He left. He’s late for a range simulation with his squad. And you don’t want to stray off Helene’s instruction. They don’t call her the witch doctor for nothing.”

“Tsk. Is it that painful?” Levi found it hard to believe that there’s still a kind of pain that would drive Erwin to flee.

Erwin appeared to be searching for the word. “It’s a different sort of pain.”

“How?” he tapped Erwin’s the side of Erwin’s shin lightly. Erwin bent his knees slightly to give him access. Levi dipped the wood strip and began to coat the hair there. “How is it different?”

“It burns,” Erwin sighed.

Levi snorted. “More than a Titan’s rotting flesh?”

“It’s… I guess it would be petty to compare…”

“Yeah?” Levi patted the fabric strip in place. “Fucking humour me. I’ve spent all day with Shadis and chasing down your hairy ass, and now I’m stuck grooming you. This wasn’t what I had in mind, being your second-in-command.”

“It stays,” Erwin said after a second of silence. “The burning sensation, and it adds, started off uncomfortable, hot and itchy pinpricks. Then it got worse. It made me want t-”

Levi ripped out the second strip. Quick, clean, without warning. Erwin’s words dissolved into a strangled grunt. He blinked and looked at Levi incredulously.

“Go on,” Levi said, the corner of his mouth lifted. He’d be lying if he said he didn’t start enjoying this.

“It made want, ah–” Erwin hissed at the cooling touch of the ointment spread by Levi’s fingers. “-jump out of my skin.”

“Or break someone’s nose, I heard,” Levi quipped, already applying wax to the next area.

“Klaus was an isolated incident. Won’t happen again,” Erwin gritted his teeth.

“Sure, now that we have you strapped to this bed tighter than a would-be amputee waiting for us to hack his mangled limbs off.”

“That’s a very grueso-”

Levi ripped out the strip, enjoying Erwin’s choked-off words.

“Although you’re kinda making the same sounds.”

Erwin sucked a big gulp of air as Levi applied the ointment, his hand clenched and unclenched beneath the leather straps. “You are enjoying this.”

“I always enjoy cleaning.”

“You enjoy having me at disadvantage.”

Levi had to smirk at that. “Payback’s a bitch.” He said, spreading wax into the last hairy strip on Erwin’s shin. The whole procedure started to have a therapeutic effect on him now.

“I’d rather we settle whatever score you are keeping on the training ground.”

Levi hummed. “You would, wouldn’t you?”  

He ripped out another strip. The bedframe creaked as Erwin’s body jerk involuntarily.

“I’d appreciate –” Erwin groaned, “- some warning…!”

For all the tidbits of stories he had gathered that day, Levi was a little bit disappointed. Erwin’s reaction had been… moderate, so far.

“I’m going to do your thigh next,” he announced, slathering the ointment on Erwin’s nicely pink and hairless shin.

“No, do my other shin first,” Erwin said.

“But it’s easier if – ”

“Levi,” Erwin cut him off, half hissing. “Trust me. Make this easier for me, please.” He strained to catch Levi’s eyes.

Levi let out a tiny puff of air. He had been concentrating so hard on task at hand to block out the awkwardness of the whole bizarre ordeal he didn’t notice how wrecked Erwin had been. His hair was damp and sticking out here and there, his face flushed, brows knitted, and he was breathing through his mouth. He swallowed and Levi’s eyes trailed the movement of his Adam’s apple, down to his clavicle, where sweat had begun to pool and trickled down to the hard ridges of his chest and stomach.

“Okay,” it was Levi’s turn to swallow. He flicked his eyes back to Erwin’s. “Only because you said please.”

Did he just say that? God,even that had sounded too playful to his own ears. Levi got up and moved his seat to the other side of the bed. Erwin trailed his movement with wide eyes, but didn’t say anything.

The light from the outside was getting dimmer by the minute, the room was swathed in shadows.

“Lindt said to do this strip by strip,” Levi said. “Because how weak you are to this kind of pain,” he felt like he needed to add that. “But it’s getting dark and you still have too much hair so I’ll do them in three and fours, save us some candles, yeah?”

Erwin groaned, “That was how Klaus did it that time.”

“I think I’m safe,” Levi said, making a point of patting the leather straps on Erwin’s arm. “I’ll risk it.”

Erwin made a pained sound.

“Is that a yes? We can have a safe word if it hurts too much.”

“Safe word?” Erwin sounded so genuinely puzzled that Levi instantly regretted the words that flew out of his mouth.

“Just tell me to stop if it gets too much,” Levi said, almost too quickly.

“Alright.”

“I have high expectation though.” Levi began applying wax on Erwin’s other shin at accelerated speed, covering the area with fabric strips neatly.

He worked in silence for a few minutes, accompanied only by Erwin’s steady breathing. That was, until he decided to talk.

“So,” he cleared his throat, “Safe words…”

It had sounded suspiciously like a question. Levi stopped his ministrations and tilted his head to meet Erwin’s eyes, trying to read the blue.

“Yeah?” He dared him to elaborate.

The seconds stretched between them. Then Erwin broke their eye contact and averted his gaze sideways. And whatever spell that was in the air was broken.

“I’ll tell you if it gets too much,” he said.

“Sure,” Levi said and ripped a strip of fabric, none too gently.

The whole bed rattled as Erwin jerked. “Warn me!” he said between gritted teeth.

“Screaming might help, you know,” Levi quipped. “Or swearing.”

Erwin looked puzzled, visibly struggling to regain control his breathing.

“Try it,” Levi said, giving up on holding back the smirk has been tugging on his lips for a while. He ripped out the next strip.

The rattle of the bed echoed in the room, yet it couldn’t fully drown the single profanity that had escaped Erwin’s mouth.

“There you go,” Levi said. “Again.” He ripped out another.

This time Erwin’s “Fuck!” was a little louder.  

“I know you can do better.” He ripped out two strips, one right after the other.

Erwin let out three “fucks” in successions. And Levi was pretty sure he had moved the bed while he was at it.

Levi was full on smiling now, for reason he didn’t quite comprehend. He took a generous amount of the ointment and spread it with both palms on Erwin’s calf. “Better?”

A ragged breath, then a huff. Erwin closed his eyes and leaned back, basking on cool relief of the ointment on his burning skin and the pressure of Levi’s fingers on his muscle. “You are a sadist,” he said, almost a mumble.

“That’s not news, ask those filthy greenhorns in my cleaning squad, they'd be happy to elaborate.” Levi dragged the metal stool to the side of Erwin’s thigh.

Whatever Erwin had meant to say to that died on his lips when he felt Levi’s hand sweep the expanse of his thigh. Just a whisper of a touch. He went very, very still.

“I’ve never realized how hairy you are. I guess your eyebrows don't lie. At this rate we’re going to be here for a while,” Levi said, eyes on the dark blond hair covering Erwin’s skin. He had expected it to feel coarse to the touch. It didn’t.

Pregnant pauses and stretched silences. It felt like they were having a different conversation. But then again, between the battles in and outside the wall and the strange, almost-domestic life at the base, things were always like this with them.

Levi snatched his hand away and busied himself with another batch of wax still warm from the small burner on the side table. And Erwin let go of the breath he didn’t know he had been holding.

“Do you only know one swear word?” Levi said, stirring the wax.

Erwin snorted. “I know a few. I sure know a great deal more since I met you.”

Levi’s dark hair fell over his face, obscuring his expression, but Erwin was pretty sure he was smiling.

“Why don’t you use them, then?”

Erwin frowned. “I don’t see the point. After all I didn’t –” he hissed when Levi applied the fresh batch on wax from the burner.

“You’re very tense.”

“- I’d- ah, I didn’t have to oversee a bunch of filthy greenhorns in cleaning duties, and apparently my standard of cleanliness is subpar anyway, compared to yours.” Erwin finished.

“I meant now, when I’m obviously torturing you. It might help you relax, you know. Let your pain out, blame someone for once, Captain.” His grey eyes flicked briefly to meet Erwin’s, then back to his work.

“I don’t exactly have anyone to curse of blame for this, Levi. Or anything else for that matter.”

“Sure.” Levi said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“It’s true. I should’ve replenished my personal reserve of honey and sugar for exactly this purpose. I was careless.”

“No. You  _should_  have been able to get them around this time if it’s not for Sina.” Levi thought he really should have this kind of conversation with Erwin. It’s useless. If there was one thing that’s detrimental to the great leader that he was, it’s his adamant belief that everything that was not going according to his plan was his fault, which he gladly accepted and stored in some dark corner of his freakishly compartmentalized mind. Levi wonder how long would it take till that guilt outgrow its allocated compartment.

“So I should curse Sina?” Erwin sounded amused.

“Yeah. Why not? Are you a Wallist?” Levi retorted. “Wait, we are  _all_  Wallists here, the good citizens of the aboveground. Let me rephrase that, did your mama raise you to fear the Goddesses and the divine retribution of the Walls? Were you  _such_ a good boy you had no dirty thoughts of Sina’s tits or Maria’s ass, or wonder during masses if those drapes were to sit any lower on Rose's hips, you'd be able to see her cunt?"

For a second there’s only the sound of the wooden stick spreading wax on Erwin’s thigh. Then Erwin laughed.

Levi made a point by adding a batch of hot wax. Erwin grimaced, but his smile persisted. “I don’t believe in the Walls. I did wonder why Rose only wears stola and why is it draped so dangerously low on her hips, she must be cold,” he said. “Oh, and I never knew my mother…” he looked like was going to say something else, but abandoned the thought.

“Mine starved to death,” Levi said, without thinking. “What little food she could get during her last days she gave to me.” He patted the last strip on Erwin’s thigh. Both thighs were now neatly covered in paper strips.

“I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault, asshole.” He had slipped, had no idea why had he brought that up.  

“No, I mean-”

Levi decided he’d done with the subject and ripped out the first strip on his thigh.

Erwin let out a curse, a new one.

“Did I hear that right?” Levi said.

Erwin blinked and bit his lip like he was embarrassed.

“Again?” Levi said as he ripped the second, and the third.

Erwin made a strangled noise but no more but no cuss words coming out of his mouth.

“I heard you earlier, Erwin,” Levi said, eyes on Erwin's face and fingers ready to rip out the next strip. “It feels good to blame her, huh.”

“Will you stop with the blas-”

The next strip Levi rip out was the one right along the center of Erwin’s thigh. The hair didn’t come off as easily as the earlier places.

Erwin let out a guttural cry, and the bedframe creaked again, his hands flew and his fists balled.

“Do you need a moment?”

“I- Sina’s tits… that fucking hurts.” Erwin sucked some air through gritted teeth.

“Yeah, she’s a real bitch. Old Mercier said she hogs all the honey and sugar, his words were ‘she keeps it close to her bosom for King’s birthday’. Fuck the King and his limp cock.” Levi ripped another two of the strips.

Erwin repeated his last few words.

“You’re getting the hang of this, Captain,” Levi said. “Let’s reward you with some more of Lindt’s magical ointment, hm?”

It sounded playful to Erwin’s ears. He wondered if Levi meant it that way.

“It doesn’t make sense,” Erwin said, by way of distracting himself from the moan that threatened to spill from his mouth at the coolness of Levi’s touch. “How do you fuck the King if he has a limp cock?”

Hearing Erwin speak some crude words sent an odd shiver through Levi’s spine. “Well, you do the fucking part, obviously.” He couldn’t help the smile that tugged at his lips.

“Right…” Erwin closed his eyes, trying not to get lost in the feeling of Levi’s hands on his inner thighs. “Assuming you’d actually want to fuck the King.”

“That’s the next logical step after kissing his ass, you know?”

Levi felt guilty immediately after saying that. But Erwin started before he could say some semblance of apology.

“It’s not the King’s that I need to kiss though, it’s everyone else’s closest to him. I’m not even sure he’s still there inside his head.”

“That’s a lot of asses.”

Levi was surprised when Erwin guffawed.

“You have no idea.” Then after a moment. “I can’t believe I’m having his conversation with you.” Levi had always been an enigma to him. He had ideas on how to best exploit his skill in the field but Erwin lacked the frame of reference he could refer to best interact with the Corporal in other settings, unlike the comrades with whom he had had years in the academy together.

“I can’t believe I’m having this conversation with you, like this, now,” Levi made a gesture. “That’s what cheap beers and seedy bars are for. You should join us once in a while.” He finished his ministration and moved to Erwin’s other side.

Erwin’s eyes followed him. “You went out with the others?”

“Once or twice,” Levi sat. “Why do you think Mike and I haven’t killed each other yet? Alcohol is a magical thing.”  

Erwin smiled. His mind went back to the first conversation he had with him. Levi had been the one that was restrained then. The reversal was oddly amusing. How things had changed since then.

Levi’s hand on his thigh jolted him back to the present.

“Rose’s holy cunt, why do you have so much hair,” he complained.

“Sounds like blasphemy is the theme of the day,” Erwin sighed.

“Well, I recall that you were squeamish about my usual repertoire, Captain Sir. Shall I switch it back to those relating to the acts defecating?” Levi said, mimicking Erwin’s poshest Sina accent.

“Spare me,” groaned Erwin.

Levi smiled and went about applying wax on Erwin’s skin. Erwin cast his eyes over him, then redirected them to the ceiling. He thought he couldn’t feel more exposed being strapped there with only a towel secured to his waist, but the chilly sensation of his dehaired and moisturized skin, coupled with the warmth of the wax, and the feel of Levi’s breath on his skin were taking it to a new level. He felt his pulse quicken and prayed to the goddesses they had just verbally defiled that his blood would not stray near the area where Levi was right now. That would be hard to explain. He willed his body to relax and his breathing to steady.

“You’re not so bad,” Levi mumbled.

“What’s that?” Erwin strained to hear.

“I start to think all this is an overkill,” Levi said.

“Legs are easier,” Erwin swallowed.

“Hn,” he acknowledged. “If it’s any consolation, Lindt said we can spare your arms. And I sure as hell ain’t doing the area under there,” He indicated the towels, eyes concentrating on the spread of the wax.

It felt like he’d been caught. Erwin was glad Levi didn’t look at him at that precise moment.

“Alright,” he patted the fabric strips covering Erwin’s thigh. “Brace yourself. I’ll do them one right after the other.”

Erwin did.

“Do I need to guide you through the cursing?”

Erwin could shake his head. “If you must.” Then it occurred to him that maybe this ridiculous cussing lesson was not so much to make him letting go of the pain but to distract him from it.

When the first strip was ripped out, he was too distracted to give any reaction more than just a hiss.

“Come on, Erwin!” he heard Levi say, but the Corporal didn’t give him a pause to recollect himself before he ripped out the second. And the third. And the next.

Erwin couldn’t screen his words. He had vague recognition of shouting abuses at the three goddesses, the King, and the high priests of the wall. Maybe he’d paired them together creatively, judging by Levi’s wide-eyed smile by the end of it.

The pain lingered, his whole thigh felt as if it had been flayed. Curse words still trickling out of his mouth, interspersed by little noises of hurt.

“I see I have underestimated you.” Levi sounded impressed.

“Goddamnit Levi,” Erwin sputtered. He was in pain, but somewhat exhilarated, furious but tickled and –

He felt Levi’s hands on his smarting skin, blessedly cool and slick with ointment. And he heard Levi say, croon, almost. “There, there”

He moaned.

Levi went still.

Erwin froze.

The moment passed and Levi’s hands continued their path, applying the cooling substance evenly. If he had deemed Erwin’s reaction inappropriate, he gave no indication of it. That was, until Erwin saw the towel on his waist tenting.

Levi saw it too.

_Fuck the King and his limp cock._

Erwin was mortified.

Levi didn’t stop his ministration. Slowly, very slowly, he lifted his gaze to meet Erwin’s. Erwin couldn’t read the grey.

“You should,” he said, voice strange. “Turn around. I’ll do your back next.”

Erwin tried to summon his voice without success, so he nodded, and made as if to get up before the clink of the metal buckles on the bed’s leather straps remind him that he’s tied to the bed.

“Could you…”

“Yeah,” Levi said, getting up. “Yeah.”

He undid the buckles. There were eight of them, four on each side. Levi moved around, movement quick but his fingers felt clumsy. He quietly cursed. He didn’t know what to think, how to react on what he just saw. Or why his face felt hot.

When the last buckle had been unclasped, Erwin turn around to lie down on his stomach. Levi caught the full show of his muscles on the work.

“Um,” Erwin said, canting his head to the side. “Could you…” he picked one of the buckles.

“Uh,” Levi said stupidly. “Yeah.” And proceeded to fasten all eight.

The last buckle he fastened was on Erwin’s wrist. Next to that wrist was the knot that held the towel wrapping around Erwin’s waist. Levi failed in not noticing that it didn’t fully cover the skin, and that from this side, Erwin looked nude.

It didn’t make sense that he felt what he was feeling at that moment. He has seen Erwin in various state of undress before but never before it made him he feel so apprehensive.

He got up and tried to shake it off. Focusing on the next task of waxing the Captain’s back.

It’s a damn broad back. It’s an expansive plane of downy skin. He picked the widest strip of fabric he had, it looked tiny. He shook his head, sighing.

“You alright?” Erwin’s voice was muffled by the mattress.

 _No._ “Yeah,” he said. “I need–” he hesitated, but there seemed to be no other way to be effective. “I’m going to climb your back,” he announced.

He gathered what he need on his hands, and made a move to climb the bed before realizing too late that he’d better taken his boots off first.

And he’d better light some candles as well. The light was getting dimmer.

_Shit shit shit shit shit._

“Levi?”

“Hang on,” he said.

Erwin heard him fussing about in the periphery of his vision. Then the lights in the room got a little brighter. Footsteps approaching the bed, then, Levi’s boots fell to the floor in a thud, one after another.

A creak of the bed. A dip in the mattress. A rustle of fabric. The feel of the coarse cotton of the standard uniform, and the scrape of the 3DMG leather on his skin. Erwin had always thought of Levi as small. All wiry muscle and strength and agility, yes, but small nonetheless, and delicate, even, sometimes, when he didn’t make a show of his sharp edges.

But the weight that settled on his waist now felt substantial. Levi shifted, searching for the most comfortable position. Erwin felt his every movement. He wondered how Levi would look now were he to turn around and lie on his back.

That image obviously didn’t help his growing erection.   

_Fuck the King and his limp cock._

Had he strayed so far from professionalism? He closed his eyes. Maybe professionalism had never existed between them.

“Alright?” he heard Levi say. He nodded.

Levi laid a hand on Erwin’s shoulder blade, fingers splayed, marveling how tiny it had look against his back. Erwin’s skin felt cool to the touch, perspiration from close contact with the sheets cooled by the air, the hair on it soft. He smelled faintly like soap, clean.

Erwin shivered, the fine hair of his neck and shoulders reacting to the warmth of Levi’s palm. He fought not to lean to the touch.

The hot wax that came next was a welcome distraction.

Levi worked quietly. He noticed that obscured by the hair, Erwin’s skin was covered in scars and markings. Stitched slashes, patches from burns, and fresh bruises - telltales of a life in constant survival mode. And there, across the broad expanse of his shoulders was the true marking of the wings of freedom, the 3DMG bruises.  

“This must chafe,” he said, running his index finger along the marking.

Erwin shifted a little, acutely aware of the calloused finger tracing his back.

“A little. I hardly feel it anymore these days.”

“Is it better with hair or worse?”

“Doesn’t make much difference.” The muscle in Erwin’s shoulder shifted, a shrug.

“Hn.”

He continued in silence.

The scrape of the wooden stick and the heat from the wax were almost hypnotic. Erwin allowed his body to relax and sagged deeper into the mattress. It felt too soon when Levi tapped his shoulder and told him to brace himself.

He steeled himself for the pain but he was caught unprepared when he felt Levi’s hand on the back of his neck and the other finding purchase on his upper arm. Then felt Levi’s weight off his waist.

“I need a leverage,” he said. “You’re fucking huge.” He shifted his weight on his knees on the mattress on either side of Erwin’s body. Erwin was aware that on top of him, Levi was on his hands and knees. He wondered what they looked like right now, how Levi would look like if-

He missed Levi’s warning. And felt the first burn of the waxing strip lick fire on his back.

He gasped. He moaned. He writhed. He nearly toppled Levi off his back.

“Shit, Erwin.” Levi steadied himself. “I’m just gonna do this real quick okay? Don’t throw me off.”

Erwin moaned. Levi tightened his hold on his neck.

“Okay?” he asked.

Erwin managed to nod.

The pain was like slashes of blade on his skin. One, two, three, then he stopped counting. His back was one giant throbbing wound. At some point he arched his back and felt Levi’s hold on his neck shift to his hair. The tug felt like a relief.

The slashes stopped. Erwin stilled, the tiniest movement hurt. A second later the ointment came and he sagged down. The mattress swallowed his moans.

“There you go. You did good,” Levi said. The words sounded too good to his ears.  

_Fuck the King and his fucking limp cock._

Erwin took a deep breath. It sounded like a sob. He closed his eyes and focused his senses on Levi’s hands on his back, slick and cool and almost apologetic.

The waxing had fully revealed the map of scars on Erwin’s back. Levi discovered that Erwin’s back had more flawed than undamaged skin. He settled his weight on Erwin’s lower back again.

“I wonder how your hair can still grow like this on such damaged skin,” he said, eyes taking in the tapestry of scars.

“My father was quite a hairy man.”

“Did he beat you up too?” Levi asked without thinking. “Many of these you carried from childhood.”

Erwin went still for a moment. Levi was kicking himself for being so out of the line, again.

But the Captain answered anyway.

“No… and yes. I grew up in royal Wallist convent. They thought I had this strong heretical leanings so they tried to beat it out of me… They were for penance, the punishments.”

“Fucking Wall humpers,” Levi hissed. “What kind of parents would send their children there?”

“I wouldn’t know. Mine were dead before I got there. It was the King who decreed that I go.”

“Fucking Fritz and his fucking sadistic limp cock.”

Laughing hurt but Erwin didn’t mind. Levi could feel the rumble and he smiled. Spreading the ointment down, he noticed a small scar on the right side of Erwin’s hip, just below the dip of his waist. Kenny had several on both arms, most of them memento from doomed relationships.

“Ex-lover?” he asked, finger tracing the peculiar scar.

“You’re quite nosy, aren’t you?” Erwin said, straining his neck to see Levi, and failing.

Levi was prepared to let the question slide.

But again he answered anyway.

“Just something stupid. Someone convinced me to put it there. I was too drunk to think it through. Then I got sober and it’s too embarrassing to have it permanently written in my skin.”

“So you can be stupid too.”

“You’d be surprised.”

Levi applied more ointment, this time spreading it outwards from Erwin’s spine. He used both hands. He considered complaining out loud on Erwin’s large frame. But he got distracted when he spread his hands out to reach the expanse of Erwin’s shoulders and noticed, how small he was compared to the Captain, not just his hand like earlier, but his whole body. He could lie on top of Erwin and the man’s frame would swallow him whole. The complaint forgotten, he still got some ointment to apply. It leaves a pattern before it dried off; it looked like Levi was painting Erwin’s back with wings.

“Levi?”

Levi realized that he had zoned off for a bit.

He swung his legs to the side and gracefully landed next to his boots. He didn’t bother dragging the stool from the other side, choosing to plop himself on the floor to pull his boots on.

Erwin watched him, eyes following the graceful unfolding of Levi’s limbs, how his feet - high arches and shapely calves accentuated by the leather straps of his 3DMG – slide into the worn leather boots. He made a mental note to get Levi a new pair, soon, from his personal budget if need be.    

Levi stood, and began to unbuckle Erwin’s straps.

“Just the chest, and we’re done.”

“Yes.” Erwin was grateful. Tender skin and strange feelings notwithstanding.

Levi circled the bed, undoing the straps on the other side. “Are you sure you still need the straps?”

“Yes.”

Levi shrugged. “Suit yourself.” He started to think that the stories he had heard all day were grossly exaggerated. Sure Erwin has a low tolerance for this kind of pain, but he wouldn’t go berserk because of it. The amputating bed had been an overkill.

“Is your back fine for lying down?” the last strap was unbuckled with a clink.

Erwin sat up slowly, turned around, and gingerly lay down again. “It’s fi-” he paused. “Fine.”

He was not fine, he was horrified. Somehow, even after enduring the last fifteen minutes of agony, his erection persisted. If anything the tent in his towel looked more fully pitched.  

Levi cast a glance over Erwin’s face, and proceeded to strap him in again. It felt like slow motion when he straightened up, lifted his eyes from the buckle and caught sight of the unwarranted hard on.

Levi frowned.

“I-“ Erwin started, made a point to not meeting Levi’s eyes. “I have no explanation for this. I apologize.” He said before Levi demanded them from him.

But he didn’t. Levi swallowed. “Well. Shit.” he made a move to the side table. Erwin heard a clatter of glass jar and the metal burner. “We don’t, most of the time.” Another, larger towel was thrown to cover his lap.

Erwin’s throat was parched. As if reading his mind, Levi brought a glass of water to his face.

“Drink up,” he said, tilting the glass. “I can’t be bothered to unbuckle you.”

As Erwin drank, their eyes met. Levi’s eyes are intent, but if there was awkwardness in them, Erwin couldn’t see it, the grey betrayed nothing. Erwin wasn’t sure the same could be said about his eyes. His pale blue tended to reveal everything.

“Thank you,” he said after, breaking their eye contact.

Levi put down the glass, and wordlessly sat down on the side of the bed to apply hot wax to Erwin’s chest.

Erwin considered closing his eyes and feigning sleep until it was the time to rip out the fabric strips, but decided against it, there was no way he could do that convincingly. And came to think of it, the worst that could happen had already happened. And Levi had brushed it off, or chosen to ignore it. Erwin might as well take advantage of it.

So he watched Levi work up close. He couldn’t see much, Levi’s dark hair obscuring most of his face. But he could see his slender nose, and take in how long his eyelashes and how sharp the curves of his upper lip were. He straightened up after a moment, groaning rolling his shoulder to a crack. Erwin’s eyes were drawn to the curve of his neck, bared from his signature cravat.

Levi inspected his work then sighed. “I need to… climb,” he said. “I’m doing a sloppy job from over here.”

Erwin blinked and looked down to check if his situation had improved. He couldn’t really tell and he didn’t feel any different, but the extra towel Levi had added had definitely mitigated the problem, or hidden it well enough.

He nodded.

Levi made to climb the bed. Then aborted it, cussing. He hastily removed his boots, his movement irritable. He also decided to do away with his 3DMG gears, leathers and metal buckles clinked to the floor.

Hadn’t Erwin wished he could see Levi on top of him just minutes earlier? He denied himself the experience though, not trusting his body with the reaction. He looked sideways, feeling Levi’s movement on the periphery of his vision, trying to quiet the part of his mind that stirred at the realization that Levi was straddling his lap.

But this time Levi put his weight solely on his knees, occasionally with a hand bracing on the spot next to Erwin’s arms, like he was trying to minimize their body contact. Understandable. Although he looked uncomfortable.

“Levi,” he said. “You can put your weight on me.”

Levi stared at him.

“You look uncomfortable,” he felt like he needed to justify that.

Levi narrowed his eyes. “Are you suggesting I sit in your lap to make myself more comfortable?”

“I – Yes.”

He expected Levi to hurl an insult, but Erwin felt Levi’s weight settled on his waist without a word.

Erwin felt compelled to address the elephant in the room. “Levi,” he began, “I’m sorry for earli-,”

“Shut up, Old Man,” Levi snipped, eyes on Erwin’s chest, not stopping his work. “Let me do my job. Try not to get too excited,” he patted a strip of fabric on the hot wax. He sounded annoyed, and then when his eyes met Erwin’s, the grey were dark and stormy.

The following silence was deafening. Levi made an extra effort to concentrate on finishing his task. The air was stifling, his face felt hot, and the situation had gone beyond ridiculous. He tried not to think about how the light cut across Erwin’s sharp cheekbones, how his icy blue eyes turn dark, how the warmth of his skin seep through his pants, and how his arousal just a mere inch away from his ass. And it’s fucking hard not to think about those things when he was currently straddling the Captain and practically tracing the contour of his sculpted chest with his hands.

But the task at hand did help. So did the steady rise and fall of Erwin’s breathing – the Captain seemed content, or maybe too embarrassed to talk. Levi tuned out the rest.

Soon he had covered all the hair in Erwin’s chest with wax and fabric. He sat back to inspect his work, squinting to see if he missed any patch. Satisfied, he looked to Erwin.

“This part was where you punched Klaus?”

“Yes,” Erwin said with a huff, feeling rather defensive. “But I wasn’t restrained then.”

“Fine,” said Levi. Then “I’m doing this like I did your back. Brace yourself.”

“Be gentle on me, Levi.”

Erwin thought he saw Levi bit his lip.

He ripped out the first strip.

Erwin jerked violently. The bed rattled. He didn’t swear, the noise that came out of his mouth was a pure, strangled noise of pain.

Erwin felt Levi’s cool hand on his shoulder, pushing him down, gentle yet firm. “Easy, Captain. One down.” His low voice sounded almost tender.

Then he ripped out two strips one after another. And even with Levi’s hand holding him down, he still couldn’t control his reaction. The chest had always been the most painful. It was strange to realize that that pained sound echoing in the room was his.

“Three down,” he heard Levi’s voice. “I’ve got four more to go. Do you want your ointment now?”

Erwin gritted his teeth, knuckles white, clutching on the bed’s leather straps. “No,” he said, voice rough. Let’s get this over with.”

Levi’s splayed hand moved to the center of his clavicle, and Erwin could feel Levi’s weight shift to the hand. There was no hesitation or gentleness in it, the grip was meant to keep him still.

“Okay, I’ll start now.”

Erwin’s world went red with pain. He had thought, he had _hoped_ that after that one incident in the past, his first waxing day before he had discovered the sugaring method, that he had grown immune to this kind of pain. He could add this one to the growing list of emotional baggage he carried from his younger days.

He didn’t remember what came out of his mouth. Maybe some of Levi’s curse words, or more noises, or sobs. Or the mixture of the three. Maybe even Levi’s name.

Then he felt the cooling touch of the ointment.

“Fuck,” he hissed. It had felt so good he could cry. Maybe he did. His vision was rather blurry. He blinked to feel tears rolling off his cheek. Levi dabbed them off, the towel felt rough on his skin. He expected some taunt, but none came.

Levi’s hands on him felt so good, his body arched to the touch. He was sure he had a full hard on now but his head was too clouded with pain to even have a modicum of embarrassment. If anything it felt a bit like being drunk, or waking up from a vivid dream where you couldn’t tell yet that it was a dream.

Levi had seen more injured soldiers delirious from pain than he cared to remember. Like Erwin had said, it seemed like a petty thing to compare the suffering of those soldiers to Erwin’s right now, but visually, Levi thought that it was the closest thing. Except, Erwin was also aroused, fully aroused. It’s impossible to ignore, his cock was jutting out in full glory. No layers of towel could hide that, especially when it rubbed against Levi’s ass.

He really tried to ignore it, but he made the mistake of looking at Erwin’s face. His blue eyes were dark, pupils fully dilated, blond hair damp and mussed, skin flushed. His parted lips were slightly swollen from bites. And he moaned. He moaned Levi’s fucking name.

Now would be a good time for him to flee, to call someone else to attend to Erwin. He’s pretty sure the Captain would understand, would have no objection, and things would resume like it had always been between them. But he couldn’t stop his hands. He wanted to make Erwin feel better, to coax more noises, expressions, and tiny involuntary movements from the normally unflappable Captain. He wanted to watch him fall apart on his hands.

He told himself it was some kind of a payback. For dragging him out of the underground to this sun-drenched, blood-soaked life. Except, it wasn’t really the truth was it? He had lost count of the score between them some expeditions ago. Whatever debt Erwin owed to him, or he to him, had been settled, time and again. He told himself that it was to satisfy some hidden sadistic urge in him. Except, he had always wanted to please Erwin, to take care of his needs. And Erwin fucking liked this.

“You like this don’t you?” he said, dragging his slick hands across the tender skin.

“Fuck. Levi,” he moaned. His body strained to meet his touch.

Levi brought his face closer to Erwin’s, his hands traveled lower on Erwin’s body, leaving a tingling path on his hot skin. His fingers tracing the soft trail of dark blond hair below Erwin’s navel. “Tell me to stop, Erwin.”

Erwin didn’t want him to stop. He let out a frustrated hiss. Some part of his mind that had come down from the pain told him to stop, to retreat back to the place they were before. But they’d been skirting on the edge for a while hadn’t they? And he had admired Levi’s physical capabilities since the second he saw him, hadn’t he? That the faceless figure that had haunted his dreams and ignited the heat low in his belly had been created in Levi’s likeness.

He had no right to, but he wanted him. And he wanted him to want him.

“I won’t stop you,” he breathed, “I don’t want you to,” a confession.

Levi groaned then his lips come crashing down on his. It was messy, all teeth and tongue and Erwin was all too eager to reciprocate. He ground his body up, his bare skin itching for friction. He discovered that Levi’s body was just as roused.

He broke their kiss, “Levi, you –”

“Shut up, Old Man,” he retorted, face flushed, pupils blown wide. “You did this to me.” And he brought their lips together again. His hand slipped under the fold of Erwin’s towels, fumbled to undo the knot and chucked them away.

Levi took Erwin’s length in his hand and swallowed Erwin moan with his mouth. Erwin retaliated by sucking on his tongue, slow and lazy and insistent, mimicking that of Levi’s hand on his cock.

They stayed like that, moving against each other, until Erwin broke the kiss to plant wet kisses along Levi’s jaw. “Untie me,” he said. ”I want to touch you.”

“No,” Levi breathed. “Not yet.”

He trailed kisses down Erwin’s neck and collarbone, then dragged his hands over the pink, hairless ridges of Erwin’s chest and stomach with relish, nail lightly scrapping the sensitive skin. He resumed planting wet kisses below his navel, down down down, and took Erwin’s cock in his mouth.

The buckles on Erwin’s restrains clinked as Erwin’s body jerked, desperately wanting to touch Levi.

“Levi,” he said. “Levi.”

Levi dragged his tongue along the underside of his cock, eyes intent on Erwin’s. He smelled of peppermint and soap and musk. He swiped his tongue on the slit, and sucked on the head before slowly releasing it with an obscene popping sound.

Erwin pulled on the restraints on his wrists. “Come here,” he barked.

“Not yet,” he said, repeating the treatment again, this time with the help of both hands. His mouth sucked and licked and hummed while calloused fingers rubbed and fondled.

There was not much Erwin could do besides take all the sensations, wave after wave after wave. He felt the pleasure coiled tighter and tighter inside of him. The he felt Levi’s slick finger nudging on his entrance. A thrill shot through his spine.

“Levi?”

“Tell me to stop.”

“I…” he hesitated. It had been so long for him. “Don’t stop.” He decided.

So Levi didn’t. He added a second finger, scissoring inside, searching for Erwin’s sweet spot. And there, as Erwin gasp gave it away, he found it.

“Levi,“ he gasped. A praise and a curse. “Levi, Levi, Levi,” a litany.

Levi took his time, alternating between jerking Erwin off and massaging his prostrate. Eyes never leaving Erwin’s face, relishing the arch of Erwin’s back, and the way his eyebrows knit and the muscle in his legs spasm, witnessing his Captain unravel.

“That’s it,” he said, “Come, Erwin.”

Erwin obeyed.

 

***

 

When he came down from his high, Levi was wiping him off with the towel, and he found all the leather straps had been unbuckled. He made a move to sit, his limbs felt heavy, his skin tingle, and his joints ache. And it was wonderful.

Levi didn’t acknowledge him, moving about to pack the equipment.

“Levi,” he said. And as he turned to look at him, Erwin could still see the bulge on his pants. But he stayed rooted to his spot. There’s a look in his eyes, like he was trying to decide on something.

So Erwin reached for his hand. He didn’t protest when he tugged him to stand between his knees. And when he kissed him, a hand cradling his head and another snaked around his waist, he melted against him. It was slower this time.

“Are we –” he started, as Erwin’s fingers unbuttoned his shirt. “Is this a good idea?”

Erwin cupped his cheek. Levi looked young like this, hesitating, barefooted without his cravat and with his hair tousled. Erwin was overcome with fondness.

“I don’t know, Levi,” he answered honestly. “But I don’t think I can look back at this with regret.”

Levi bit his lip. Erwin kissed it, then kissed his chin, and his neck. His hands resumed their previous task. “Tell me to stop.” He said, throwing Levi’s words back at him.

He felt Levi’s hand tugging his hair, and when he met his lips for a kiss, they were smiling.

He pushed Levi’s shirt off his shoulders and palmed his arousal, stroking it through the pants until Levi cursed in protest and broke away from their kiss to get rid of his remaining clothes and pushed Erwin back onto the bed. And climbed on his lap. His cock brushed Erwin belly, and they kissed again, reveling on the skin on skin sensation.

Levi let out a delicious moan as Erwin closed his fingers around his erection and began stroking. His limbs curled around Erwin’s body and his movement became more erratic. Erwin’s cock was stirring awake from the friction.

Erwin’s hands moved to cup his ass and kneaded. Levi moaned low and slowly licked Erwin’s ear, his tongue darting in and out suggestively. Erwin groaned, Levi reached back and pushed the ointment canister to his hand.

Erwin unscrewed it open. The peppermint ointment felt cool on his finger. Levi hissed as Erwin spread it on his entrance. He pushed inside and Levi arched his back, sinking Erwin’s finger deeper inside of him.

Erwin couldn’t help biting Levi’s pale column of a neck.

“You’re going to leave a mark,” Levi protested.

“You wear cravat,” Erwin said without remorse, and proceeded to suck on the spot he had just bitten.

Levi tugged harder on Erwin’s hair. Erwin added a second finger inside of Levi. Levi pressed their bodies even closer, shifting his weight on his knees, both hands now tugging on Erwin’s hair. Erwin took advantage of the position to suck one of Levi’s puckered nipples. Levi whimpered.

“You’re sensitive,” Erwin said, before playfully bit Levi’s other nipple.

“Shut the fuck up.” Levi said heatedly.

Erwin smiled and rubbed that spot inside of him with his fingers. Levi gasped and keened. And reached between them to grab at Erwin’s resurrected erection and thumbed on its slit. Erwin groaned.

It had turned into a game, with one tried to outpleasure the other.

“Erwin,” Levi said shortly after he added the third finger inside of him. “Give it to me.”

Erwin pulled away to meet his eyes. “Are you sure? You don’t have t-”

“Sina’s cunt,” he cut him off, sounding furiously, deliciously wrecked. “Fucking... fuck me already.”

Erwin slicked his cock, the peppermint burning cold on his sensitive skin. He pulled out his fingers and positioned himself on Levi’s entrance. Impatient, Levi simply let himself sit on Erwin’s cock, sinking to its hilt.

“Oh.” Erwin said. The cold to hot sensation was almost too much. He clutched Levi tight, struggling to regain control for a moment. He’s not alone, Levi was fighting a similar battle.

“Fuck,” he said. “Fuck me, you’re huge.”

Erwin laughed and smothered him with kisses and caresses.

It was Levi who rocked against him first, hands braced on Erwin’s shoulder. Then Erwin put his hands on his hips and joined his quest to find a rhythm. It didn’t take long before he took charge, holding Levi tight enough to bruise and slamming in and out of him. Levi uttered all manners of profanities in between moans and ragged breath. And soon they both went quiet, breathing each other's air in a shared rhythm, stubbornly holding on just to see the other reach climax first.

When Erwin's hand closed around Levi's weeping cock and stroke it in tandem with their fucking, Levi succumbed first. The heat coiling tight low in his belly burst into pearly ropes across Erwin’s hairless chest. The shudder that ran through Levi’s body, Erwin's name broken on his lips, and the scratches his nails made on his back, tipped him over the edge as well. They collapsed in a sticky heap of tangled limbs on the mattress.

 

***

 

“Do you think if I run to the shower to clean up first, I can still catch some dinner in the hall?”

“I doubt it. I’d say we take our time to shower and just go straight to the kitchen to get some food...”

“Yeah...”

"Though I don't think Tilda will be happy with us rummaging in her kitchen. She might smack us with her mighty wooden spoon."

“She won't. She has a soft spot for you.”

“Really?”

"How do you think I managed to pilfer some food to deliver to your office in the dead of the night?"

“Very well. You should go straight to your room after showering then. I’ll bring you your dinner for a change.”

“…Fine.”

 

***

 

  
The meeting took longer than expected, as usual. Levi fidgeted in Erwin’s office, irritated, but grateful to have been spared the brass meeting. It was quiet, the only sound in the room was the pitter patter of the rain hitting the window.

When the knock came he wasn’t expecting Erwin – who would knock the door to his own office? But it was indeed him. The Captain was carrying a tray filled with a steaming teapot, two cups and a jar of dark brown liquid, and a lemon.

“You could have just told me to make tea,” Levi said as they sat down on the couch.

“It’s on my way,” Erwin said. “I don't want to it get cold while you're waiting. And I want you to try this", he handed him the jar.

Levi fixed him with a questioning look.

“It’s snowdrop honey. All my suppliers have replenished their stocks and now I have too much.”

“So? You’d need it eventually anyway. Keep it.”

“I have enough. And this particular honey goes great with tea.”

Levi shrugged and put the jar down on the table. Erwin poured some tea into the cups, and opened the jar. The smell was sweet, it reminded Levi of the smell of the bakery in town, but this was sharper, more potent. Erwin scooped the liquid, up close it was golden, and mixed it with the drink. He sliced the lemon and added some of its juice to the tea.

Levi squinted. “Tell me this isn’t one of Hange’s recipes.”

Erwin laughed. “I swear it’s not. It’s a well-known recipe. But it's not so easy to procure the ingredients nowadays.”

Levi simply stared at the cup.

“Go on.”

Levi gingerly picked the cup in that peculiar manner of his, by the rim instead of the handle. Erwin had thought to ask him why, but decided that the question could wait.

Levi blew on the tea’s surface and took a sip. Then he closed his eyes and stayed still.

It was pure bliss. Rich and sweet and refreshing. He savored the warm liquid in his mouth. 

When he opened his eyes Erwin was smiling. Smug bastard.

“You’ll keep it?”

"If I do, will you stop overcompensating for what happened last time?"

Erwin was silent. Then "I don't know what you mean."

Levi sighed. "New boots, new cravat, now this..." 

"I-" Erwin said. "Did we," he aborted, then looked at Levi like he had decided on something. "Did you fuck me last time just because I was in pain?"

Levi almost choked on his tea, he didn't expect Erwin to spell it out just like that. "... no," he admitted. He thought to elaborate, but hell if he could put that in words, he wasn't even sure how they had gotten to this point in their relationship. So he didn't say anything else.

Erwin's gaze softened. "Neither did I you."

He let that sink in.

"And I did not give you those things to overcompensate for anything. I simply have the means to."

Levi seemed to accept that.“I can’t believe you’ve been wasting this expensive shit to make pulling hair out of your skin less painful.”

“Yes, I thought of that,” Erwin smiled ruefully. “I’ve decided I’d wean myself off it, might as well getting used to waxing the normal way. That is, if you don’t mind performing the procedure.”

Levi sipped his tea.

"Fine,” he said. 

"... though, I think it might be more interesting if you were to do it with honey."

Erwin seemed determined to make him choke on the tea.

It took Levi a moment to come up with a response.

"Pervert," he said, the word felt inadequate to express everything that he felt.

But Erwin smiled like he understood it anyway.

 

***

**Author's Note:**

> I credit my most fabulous bestiest best friend [kleficklepick](http://archiveofourown.org/users/kleficklepick/pseuds/kleficklepick)  
> for the completion of this fic and for dragging me out of my writing dry spell. Thanks boo! This is for you!
> 
> Initially, this was going to be my contribution for bottom!Erwin week, sort of hahaha. But alas, real life got in the way.
> 
> So it's a New Year oneshot fic thing. I hope you guys enjoyed. It started with this silly idea of body hair interfering with the 3DMG straps, and it spun out of control from there. Basically the whole premise was an excuse to put Erwin and Levi in a situation where they can flirt and touch and ferret out details about each other in relative freedom (with leather straps and pain and wax, nonetheless) in the canon universe, before actually going at it :p. 
> 
> I might have gone overboard with their super long conversation. Thank you for reading it till the end.
> 
> Thanks for suspending your disbelief *sweats* and bear with the smut.This is the first smut I write since aaaaaaaages ago.  
> This is the longest single chapter I have ever written in my life! I swear I was going to make them jerk each other only. but of course Erwin has to top and they have to do it all the way because no one is stopping anyone.
> 
> In my headcanon Moblit addresses everyone with their military rankings. He's properly polite like that :)
> 
> I will update my other chaptered eruri fanfic soon, I hope. Checkout  
> [Propaganda](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3807076/chapters/8482972)  
> if you like my work.  
> Please do comments, it means the world to me! Drop me some words or any word, I'd love to hear from you :)


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